WORLDS LONGEST BLT

So I stumbled across this story about some folks in St. Louie who were attempting to break the World Record for the largest BLT sandwich. Truth be told I was drawn to the story because of the mention of 500lbs of beautiful tasty bacon that was needed to make the sandwich.

Then I saw a picture, and I call "Shenannigans". It isn't one piece of bread, just a bunch of separate pieces of bread laying next to each other. If you look closely you can even see that each piece was prepared on its own cutting board. Look, the fact of the matter is that ANYBODY can make "The Worlds Longest Sandwich" via this method. The only thing holding you back is $$$.

To truly be a "World Record" it should be something that is actually difficult. Like being able to cook a bun that is 179 feet long. THAT is an achievement. Guiness should rethink their rules for this sort of thing, or at least change the title to "longest chain of BLT sandwiches stacked end to end".

STOLEN CAR FOUND

A stolen car that belongs to an 82 year old German woman was found in a neighbours garage roughly 2 years after it was first reported missing. However this isn't a story about everyone being suprised that the neighbour was a thief. Turns out the car was parked it in the wrong garage.

Closer to home the CIA has smashed a terrorist group that had spent 3 years travelling the Middle East, buying guns, and hatching an elaborate plan involving kidnapping and murder to further a global jihad. Arrested were Aa'idah Mohammed Salem, Nesrin Waleed, and... oh wait, sorry... arrested was American-born Daniel Boyd, a drywall contractor from North Carolina. His neighbours were very suprised, and claim he was "the nicest terrorist they ever met".

30 YEAR GARDEN

A 30-year old garden that I can only describe as a labour of love is in danger of being razed by the municipality of Mississauga (a suburb that wishes it was Toronto but not nearly as hip) because of a single complaint by a neighbour.

After not enforcing a bylaw for 30 years the city is apparently now moving forward and informed Carmela and Frank Loconte, a retired couple who own the adjacent property and have maintained the city owned plot since 1979, to prepare for the worst. The garden will be bulldozed and replaced with grass due to the impact their perennial wonderland has on sight lines which apparently constitute a clear and present danger. This despite city workers saying as recently as last week that the garden was fine. Mississauga should be careful however, as Frank is a retired lawyer.

This isn't the first time we have seen similar complaints. While this case revolves around a city owned plot of land we have seen other stories where property owners who were concerned with the environment have replaced boring turf lawns with perennial wildgrasses or natural indigenous plantings that disrupt some suburbanites concept of a "proper" frontage. Despite it being more a concern about aesthetics the complaints usually revolve around visibility concerns since these gardens clearly grow higher then turf grass. We all know most bureaucrats are so keen on behaving like big brother when it comes to safety issues it only makes sense that folks opposed to environmentally sound landscaping use this tactic.

Details can be found on the Mississauga News website.

COLLECTIVE EFFICACY

A sstudy out of Britian has determined that how well neighbours know and are willing to support each other has an impact on the development of thier children. Neighbourhoods with higher so-called "collective efficacy" (social networks that pursue a common purpose) have a corresponding decrease in anti-social behavior among children who live in the neighbourhood.

WALL WTF

A woman is Scottburg, New Zealand is literally a prisoner in her own home after a neighbour built a concrete wall in front of her driveway. Unfortunately the story does not go into details of property lines, right of way, etc. but the picture of this poor old lady says it all.

Brenda Hayle has owned her home, and used this same driveway to enter and exit the property for 25 years. She has appealed to the city but like most civic bureaucracies they are useless. As far as her neighbour goes, she must be on a different planet because she claims she has done nothing wrong. WTF?

KITCHEN RENO

I've heard lots of horror stories over the years about renovations turning neighbours against each other. I am happy to say that over the last month I have lived through one and never really had anything I could complain about on this blog.

Our next door neighbours are nearing the end of a major kitchen renovation that involved knocking out a wall and building an addition to their house. I can honestly say that the work never started too early, or extended late into the evening. The contractors were polite and professional, the debris was cleaned up nightly, etc. Other then being without phone/internet for 24 hours when they accidentally hit a buried cable the entire process has been painless.

Turns out they actually did "call before you dig" and the utility folks that came out only marked out one set of gas lines/sewage pipes, etc. Who would have thought my phone line would go out a few feet from my house, under my neighbours driveway, and then turn towards the junction box? The sign was a joke more then being upset. I stole his wireless signal for the night and warned him I would do it.

I have a great relationship with all my neighbours, and I would joke with them constantly about how I was calling in the inspector or just lodged a complaint with the city. It definately helps to have the kind of relationship where you can do something like that. In the end it is all about openness and communication. I remember that they shared with us their plans every step of the way so nothing would be a suprise.

Have you lived through a painless neighbour renovation? Or not? Share your story by sending it to me at ca1v1n@hotmail.com